|
Hi to all,
Once again I am here with some "delicate" issues ,
This is remotely related to relationship based things.
I would appreciate if anybody could share a good knwoeldge if they have or know any experiences in this area and shade some light.
To begin with, I happen to meet my friend (again she is on search of groom). she met this guy, liked him a lot though in first meeting itself the guy told her that his brother is mentally handicapped from birth.
even though she liked his bio-data and after speaking over the phone , she found him extremly nice natured.
Now her parents are totally opposing this marriage, where girl-boy is kind of grown fond of each other.
Her questions,
1) Is there any scientific data proved that marrying a perosn having mentally handicapped family member may prove risky for her offsprings? if so ,what are the chances of passing such genes in family?
2) is it really hereditory ?
3)will it affect her relationship with her partner for any such reason if that memebr also stays with them?
My apologies to be accepted in advance as I sense this topic is very delicate and sensitive and might be hurting directly or indirecty to those affected if any.
Note:This is NOT braught up here out of curiosity but for genuine interest of this girl and boy where she cant even discuss this with the same guy. as her parents also not trying to hear her side. It would be good if you anybody out here supports their views based on scientific data
|
Yogibear
| |
| | Monday, June 27, 2005 - 2:50 am: | 
| 
|
Manuswini: Out of curiosity.... wont it help both the guy and girl to take these questions to a doctor rather than take public opinion!
Sorry to change the topic....
|
Gurudasb
| |
| | Monday, June 27, 2005 - 3:00 am: |
|
|
KrÜKrca ivacaar krayalaa laavaNara p`Xna Aaho. maanasaÜpcaar t& Ê AaiNa Aata Kup p`gatI Jaalaolyaa
jaonaoiTk Xaas~atIla t&aMcaa ha ivaYaya hataLNyaasa sahBaaga hvaa. %yaa dRYTInao %yaa BaiganaInao
dÜnhI kuTuÊbaanaa ivaXvaasaat Gao]na p`ya%na kravao. Aaja samaajaat AXaI barIca kuTuMbao Aahot baGaNyaat
yaa p`XnaasaarKI .
|
Yogibear,
rightly said, i did suggest same to her. but she fears it might be hurting to the boy to talk about it.
And secondly, she feels what if she does not get married finally to this guy due to parents oppstiion or doctors suggestion(if he says "not good" ) then it would be really bad. her feeling, why to humilate someone or emotinal cause pain to this boy.
anyways, I am trying to help her as she could not take her parents in confidence or spoke openly about this with boy for all said above reason.
I did warn that you cant go by lay-man people opinion or someones jsut views & comments when she being aware of my membership with hitguj.
She geuinely wanted to see if anybody out here knows or is a doctor and might share views.
folks, if you think this is wrong place then may be I can explain her that.
Manu
|
Aa||r dovanaagarI áhayalaI baajaulaaca tumaI tr ca@k [inglaXa maQaI sauÉ kola hoÆ Aata ksa kLava maaJyaasaar#yaalaa
tumaca fakDu [inglaXaÆ manauisvanaIÊ tuJa %yao kaya p`XNa hOtI naa to marazIt Anauvaad kÉna dovanaagarIt
ilava bar² tr maga maa(a DÜca@yaat to iXartIla Ana manga myaa ]<ar dovau XakIna 
AdrvaajaÊ tuJaI pÜsT [ggaID 
|
limbotimbu,
honestly speaking my marathi is not that strong when it comes to expressing some situation. Like I said its all thanks to marathi sites like manogat ,maayboli atleast I could express better in marathi few things.
aani mala "devanagari" lihayala kantala yeto.
khoop kathin aahe.
limbutimbu,
paan javu de, tumhi ugich kashala aaplya (chhotya) mendula tras deta:-),ha vishay tasa kathin aahe
take it easy:-)
jokes apart,
p`Xana ha Aaho ik kÜNaI lagna kravao kI naaih jar maulaacya kuTumabaat eÓaid vyakit vaoDI AsaolaÆ XauBara~I
Êcalaa ]Va BaoTu
|
manga Gyao maa(a CÜT\yaa maonducaI ]<ar
maa(a mato vaoDacao dÜna mau#ya p`kar Asatat²
ek AnauvaainXakÊ dusara pirisqatIjanya
dÜnaIbaI p`karatÊ vaoDacaI tIva`ta vya> hÜNyaacaa kalaKND Ana vya>tocaI tIvyata kmaIjaast Asau Xakto
AnauvaainXak p`karatÊ ha^ispTla maQaI daKla kravyaa laagaNaaáyaa vaoDanpasaunaÊ to kmaIjaast ivaixaPtpNaaÊ
itrsaTpNaaÊ táhovaakpNaa [qapÜ<aur kmaI tIva`tocaI ]dahrNao idsatat jaI ik%yaokda AÜLKuhI yaot naahIt
pirisqatIjanya vaoDathI tsaoca Asato pNa pirisqatIjanya vaoD tulanaonao jaast tIva`tonao vya> hÜt Asau
Xakto va yaÜgya ]payaanaI laÝkr barohI hÜvau Xakt Asaavao.
var iknvaa vaQaucyaa kuTumbaacyaa [ithasaat eKadI vya>I vaoDI Asaola tr tÜ p`kar pirisqaitjanya ho
kI AnauvaainXak to baGaavao laagaolaÊ AnauvaainXak Asala tr BaivaYyaatIla santtIcyaa dRYTIna ivavaah TaLNao
]<amaÊ santtIca hÜvau VayacaI nasala tr kunaabarÜbarhI lagna krava karNa mauLat ivavaah banQana iknvaa
%yaaca inayama caangalaI santtI hÜvauna caangalaa maanavavanXa vaaZIsa laagaavaa yaa krta Asato.
pirisqatIjanya vaoDacao ]dahrNa Asaola tr pirisqatIcyaa AByaasa kÉna maga ivavaahacao jamavaNyaasa hrkt
nasaavaI. santtIcaa mau_a ihqahI laagau pDtÜ
maulaacyaa kInvaa maulaIcyaaÊ kuNaacyaahI kuTumbaat AXaI vya>I Asala trIhI kaLjaI GaoNa AavaXyak ho
maaJa tÜDk maÜDk ivacaar CÜT\yaamaondutuna kaZuna maanDla hOtIÊ Xaais~ya AaQaar kahI naahI tovha ilambyaa
vaa@yama p`maaNama Asa QaÉ nayaoÊ Qarlyaasa myaa jabaabadar nha AaiQaca saangauna zIvatÜ ho²
|
yaok Ajauna mau_a saucalaa²
pirisqatIjanya vaoDatÊ kmajaÜr maanaisakta Aqaa-t inaraXaaÊ ApyaXa pcaivaNyaacaI takd nasaNao yaa baabaI
p`amau#yaana samBavatat tr
AnauvainXak vaoDatÊ XaairrIk kmajaÜrItuna ]d\BavaNaaro maonducao Aajaar ho karNa p`BaL Asau Xakto maa~
dÜnhIthI dÜnhI p`karcaI vaOiXaYT\yao kmaIjaast p`maaNaat idsatat²
cau. Bau. Va. Gyaa.
|
Manya
| |
| | Monday, June 27, 2005 - 4:41 am: |
|
|
Manu
To best of my knowledge, not all mental disorders are genetically inherited. There are several reasons for a person to be mentally challenged from birth (example - alcohol/drugs intake during the pregnancy). But there is also a possibility of genetically inheritable disease (example -down syndrome). Some of those would be relatively easy (but may be expensive)to figure out (example karyotyping etc).
My personal opinion is that this particular couple could go ahead with marriage (provided other things are matching etc). Also would be good consult to with doctors.
I was about to mention this point on the other BB, but thought it would be really boring science, but anyway I would briefly mention it here.
We carry two copies of each gene, one inherited from mother and other from father. If one of the copy is defective, then there is a relatively less chance of any dangerous consequences as this defective copy would be masked by the other normal copy at its functional level. In such case the person is normal but termed as carrier. This person would have normal life but he may pass on this defective copy to his/her child at 50% chance. Now if this person marries to another carrier (with one defective copy), then their child getting both defective copies and manifesting the disease would be at 25% chance. But receiving one defective copy would be 50% (in which case child would be normal but carrier), and completely normal non-defective copies would be again be 25%. (This is the reason Bro-Sis marriage should be avoided since if they are likely to be carrier then their next generation would be at 25% risk of getting the disease). This very simplistic (but still real) situation. There could be more complicated situations.
In the case you have posted, if there is no such history from girls side and boys brother is the only example in their family then risk to their children would be minimal.
malaa dovanaagarIt ilaihta yaot AaiNa tsa ilahayalaa AavaDtih pNa ha topic english maQao malaa jaast vyavaisqat pNao ilahta Aalaa maNauna ho post english maQao. cau. Bau. dyaa. Gyaa.
|
manyaa||| gauD pÜsTÊ malaa AavaDlaI ho ro BaÜ
Now if this person marries to another carrier (with one defective copy), then their child getting both defective copies and manifesting the disease would be at 25% chance.
(atla 25 T@ko kL\Lo naahIt
|
Thipka
| |
| | Monday, June 27, 2005 - 5:26 am: |
|
|
ilaMbauiTMbau manauisvanaIlaa mentally handicapped mhNajao vaoD mhNaayacao nasaUna maitmaMd Asao saaMgaayacao Aaho ³Asao vaaTto´.
manauisvanaI Da^@TrI maaihtI naahI %yaamauLo f> itsaáyaa p`Xnaa ba_la
maitmaMd Baavaalaa saaMBaaLNyaacaI jabaabadarI " naohmaI " itcyaa hÜNaaáyaa navaáyaavar AaiNa mhNajaoca itcyaavar sauwa rahIla ho tuJyaa maOi~NaIlaa maanya Asalyaasa
AaiNa %yaalaa itcaI tyaarI Asalyaasa problems yao} nayaot.
|
izp@yaaÊ saa^llaID pa^nT ro² maana gayao²
Aapunako idmaaga mao yao saoknD Aa^PXana Qyaanamao[ca nahI Aayaa
manyaa %yaavar baI ilava ro²
|
Manya
| |
| | Monday, June 27, 2005 - 6:23 am: |
|
|
L.T.
I am putting a picture here, hope that helps.
Top horizontal line in box the box is fathers combination of genes one normal (N) and one defective (d), same is for mother in the left vertical line. For oblongs in green color show possible combination in children NN is completely normal, dd defective..
I guess this enough of science.
|
manyaaÊ laO Kasa pr
NN = 0%
ND OR DN = 50% ivaca kuD baI k^irArÊ Ana XaovaTI
DD = 100% [nfo@ToD.
tvaa 25 ksa kaya yaotatÆ sahja Xanka mhNauna ivacaartÜ ho ha raga maanau nakܲ
Ana to maitmand ba_la pNa ilahI kI
|
Aj_onnet
| |
| | Monday, June 27, 2005 - 7:37 am: |
|
|
Aro ilaMbauÊ caar possible outcomes (NN, ND, DN, DD) Aahot. %yaatlao ³ DD ´ ho
ekca outcome Asalao tr disease hÜvaU XaktÜ. baakI 3 cases maQyao kahI QaÜka naahI. %yaamauLo to % 1/4 *100 = 25% yaoto.
|
Sayonara
| |
| | Monday, June 27, 2005 - 7:41 am: |
|
|
manaisvanaIÊ maaJyaa maOi~NaIcaa Baa} janmatÁ mentally challenged Aaho AaiNa itcaa lagna JaalaolaM AsaUna itlaa ek maulagaa hI Aaho jaÜ vyavaisqat Aaho. baakI genes ba_la malaa kahI knowledge naahI.
|
Manya
| |
| | Monday, June 27, 2005 - 7:51 am: |
|
|
LT
The % mentioned here, is with respect to the possibility/probability of the child getting both normal copies, one normal copy or both defective copies. Therefore 1 out of 4 childrens of this couple is likely (in theory) could get both defective copies, or both normal copies, whereas 2 out of 4 are likely (in theory) to recieve one normal and one defective copy.
|
manauisvanaIÊ
what manya has written is 100 % correct. Your friend may consider doing a simple blood test to confirm that she is also not a carrier (seems unlikely from what you say). The only other way to be completely sure is to test the boy's blood. I don't know what their situation is and if they will be open enough with each other to carry out that test.
Not just in this case, but I would recommend a pre-marital blood test for every couple intending to get married.
Are you sure the girl's parent's are not opposing this match because they feel this couple will have to bear the responsibility of the brother ? (which, although would be considered their duty, is not an easy task).
wish your friend good luck for all of us.
|
Tipka,
Excellent point to be noted.
Punya,
again, agree with you. I guess she was made aware by all our friends groups, this boy being only son( normal son) and would definitely have to take care of his brother whose taken care by his parents now. but what next?
he is not veda, but matimand
Manya,thanks for info
as for girls parents I did sense that no parents would like to see girl suffering and carrying additional burden after marriage.
shevati kaay andhale prem nantar tiche dole ugadanar.:-)
May be I would openly ask her the reason of her parents oppostion.
and would also remind her that after all once you marry , his responsibility is your responsibility. you cant ignore or grudge later.
limbutimbu,
tumchya chotya mendune paan changle explain kele:-))(take it easy...je tumhi manta na kaay te .."diva ghya")
mala ya "diva ghya" cha artha paan ethil eka friend ne sangitala. aadhi kalalech nahi ki lok diva ghya ka mantat..very funny english conversion though.
Thanks folks.
|
Manya excellent explanation dilay . Good
|
|
| मायबोली |
|
| चोखंदळ ग्राहक |
|
| महाराष्ट्र धर्म वाढवावा |
|
| व्यक्तिपासून वल्लीपर्यंत |
|
| पांढर्यावरचे काळे |
|
| गावातल्या गावात |
|
| तंत्रलेल्या मंत्रबनात |
|
| आरोह अवरोह |
|
| शुभंकरोती कल्याणम् |
|
| विखुरलेले मोती |
|
|
|
|