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no, I interpreted it correctly. i just don't agree with it. the definition of marriage does not change with geographic location.
manauisvanaI tuJaa kDo kahI experience Aaho ka jyaanaI tU ho [tkM zama pNao saaMgato Aahosa Æ or is this statement born of a sentiment that "such things are done only by americans - primarily because they are dysfunctional". (this may sound silly, but a vast majority of us believe this).
I'm not fighting / arguing. I'm only tring to figure out why there is such a disconnect between what people perceive american's do, and what american's really do.
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Champak
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| | Friday, June 10, 2005 - 1:54 pm: | 
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The concept of marriage in India and western culture is different.
When I first time gave invitation card of my sistres marriage , my professor said, ' wish her a healthy and LONG married life'
I was puzzled on the word LONG. So he explained that , here in west, divorce is very common. So when a couple marry, they have in their mind that, if the things go wrong, they may end the relation. This is normal here. (although all the marriages are so-called love marriages.)
But in India, we dont think of divorce when we think of marriage (some so-called hi-fi society may think of that!)
So this is difference in concept and not the sentiment.
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champak - there are all kinds of people everywhere. you cannot generalize such things. anyway maI vaosTna- saÜsaayaTI maQyao lagna iTktat kI naahI (a var cacaa- krt naahI Aaho. that is outside the scope of this discussion.
But, in america - and I write this from experience - not all married couples have separate accounts. Not all of them think divorce is an option. Not all of them go through love marriages. Similarly, not all of them abandon their elderly parents in old-age homes (another pet peeve that I have heard time and time again).
My point is vya>I itt@yaa p`kRtI. tumhI ikvha manauisvanaI Amaoirkot iktI vaYa- rihlaa Aahat malaa maaiht naahI.
pNa kÜNaa hI ba_la Asao pUva- ga`h kÉna GaoNa barÜbar nahI Asa malaa vaaTtM. sagaLI kDo sagaL\yaa svaBaavaacaI
laÜkM Asatat. tovha Amaoirkna kplsa naI lagnaa naMtr vaogaLo AkÝMT\sa baaLgaNaM ho naa^ma-la AahoÊ AaiNa
Baaritya kplsa naI tsaM kolaM tr they are doing something wrong, Asaa ivacaar krNaM caUk Aaho.
lagna yaXasvaI krNyaacaI AaiNa hÜNyaacaI Aajauna barIca karNaM Aahot.
ultimately you have find what works for both of you and accept that as your decision. There is no right or wrong choice.
AsaÜ. to vaa@ya malaa ekdma KTklaM mhNauna baÜlalao. baakI tumacaM caalaU Va.
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Champak
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| | Friday, June 10, 2005 - 2:24 pm: |
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maI Amaoirkot nhaÊ spona maQaI hoÊ Ana spona AaiÍ,kocyaa varlyaa kDalaa ho.
tu ilaihlaolao sagaL\yaaMnaa maanya ho pNa ik<aI T@ko laÜk tsao gauD\DI gauD\DI vaagatatÆ yaxa p`Xna
ho naaÆ
Ana [qao spona maQaI 28 %
GaTsÔÜT nausato lagnaanaMtr 5 ca vaYaa-t hÜtat. TÜTla sÔÜT 60% cyaa puZo ho² AsaM maI TIvaI var irpÜT- maQaI pahIlao Aaho.
manauisvanaIÊ tuJao to ÔÜnavarlao Ajauna zrlao ka nha to na saaMgata ca tu qaoT pOXyaacao kaya krayacao
(acaa pNa Pla^na kÉ ha-yalaIsaÆ Aa^Æ kaya ho² C\yaa²
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Chandya
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| | Friday, June 10, 2005 - 4:10 pm: |
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number of accounts should be based on needs for convenience (e.g. nearby ATM, 7-day banking), managing finances (bill pymts, investments) etc.
if the foundation of marriage is going to be based on insecurity, then better not get into those waters. there are options like live-in relationships.
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Nalini
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| | Friday, June 10, 2005 - 4:17 pm: |
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manau Cana ivaYayaalaa sauÉvaat kolaI Aahosa.
caaÉ nao AaiNa p`XaaMtnao mhTlyaap`maaNao itna accounts caI klpnaa pNa yaÜgya Aaho. Aqaa-t %yaacaI garja Baartat kItI Aaho ho saaMgaNao jara AvaGaD vaaTto.
account dÜna Asaavaot kaÆ joint Asaavao kI nasaavaoÆ Aaplao vaogaLo Asao account Asaavao AaiNa %yaaba_\la jaÜDIdaralaa saaMgaavao kI naahI Æ ho sava- p`Xna tovhaca ]pisqat hÜtat jaovha
tu AaiNa maI ho vaogaLo AahÜt (acaI jaaiNava hÜto. lagna kÜNato hI AsaÜ ³Aa vaDIlaaMnaI kIMvaa svatÁ
jauLvalaolao´ jaÜpya-Mt ekmaokaMvar puNa- ivaXvaasa Aaho tÜpya-Mt ho p`Xnaca ]pisqat hÜt naahIt.
love marriage maQyao ekmaokaMnaa samajaavauna Gyaayalaa Ê Baivatvyaacaa ivacaar krayalaaÊ svaPna phayalaa purosaa vaoL
imaLtÜ. tsao maa~ arranged marriage maQyao hÜt naahI . saurvaatIcaa kahI kalaavaQaI ha svaBaavaÊ AavaDIinavaDI AÜLKNyaat jaatÜ.jaovha saMsaar
sauÉ hÜtÜ AaiNa saamaaijakÊ saMsaarIk AaiNa vyaavaharIk jabaabadarI kÜNaI AaiNa iktpt isvakarayacaI ho
ek ivacaaranao zrto qaovhaca account cao svaÉp kÜNato Asaavao ho zrto.
Joint account AsaNao ih klpnaa kahI vaT naahI. Aamacao gaolao saha vaYaa-pasauna ³dÜna vaYa- lagnaaAaiQa Ana caar vaYa-
lagnaanaMtr´ joint account Aho. maI puNyaat iXakt hÜto Ana tÜ baaramatIt naÜkrI krt hÜt. %yaaca account maQauna maI hvao tovaZo pOsao ³garjaonausaar´ vaaprt Asao. tsaoca maI baaMV`alaa C-DAC krt hÜto toMvh tÜ mahapolaa Glemmark maQyao hÜt. dr mahInyaacyaa Kcaa-saaiz maI pOsao nyaayalaa yaoNao ikMvaa %yaanao Vayalaa yaoNao (apo@Xaa
%yaacao salary account ho joint account kÉna Aaimh saÜskrir%yaa pOsao vaapÉ XaklaÜ.
malaa pNa vaaXaItca naÜkrI imaLalyaanaMtr maaJaohI account ]GaDlao gaolao .sava- Gar Kcaa-ica jabbabadrI maaJaI AsalyaakarNaanao tsaoca model bank hI maaJyaa XaaLolagatca Asalyaanao toca account vaaprNao saÜpo hÜto. AaiNa %yaacyaa account caa vaapr h ADInaDIlaa tsaoca bacatKato mhNauca krt. Aamacyaat kQaIca vaad Jaalao nahIt ikMvaa yaapuZo
hI hÜNaar naahI karNa ho sagaLo kahI Aaplao Aaho hIca Baavanaa Asato. Aqaa-t ho sava- khI eKado standard zrvaavao Asao Kasa zrvauna kolaoca naaihÊ Aaplyaasaaiz saÜskr AaiNa Aaplyaa ihtacao kaya hoca mah%vaacao
hÜto.
Aa^sT/Iyaat Aalyapasauna ekca account Aaho AaiNa %yaacao kaD- pNa maIca vaaprto.
mhNaunaca XaovaTcao ekca saaMgaavaosao vaaTto account dÜna Asaavaot kaÆ joint Asaavao kI nasaavaoÆ Aaplao vaogaLo Asao account Asaavao AaiNa %yaaba_\la jaÜDIdaralaa saaMgaavao kI naahI Æ ho jyaanao %yaanao Aap Aaplyaa pwtInao saÜDvaavao.
AaiNa Asao p`Xna sauTtca nasatIla Ê tuJao maaJao hÜt Asaola tr ek~ rahNyaapoxa GaTsÔÜT Gyaavaa.
ho maJao Aaplao spYT mat.. kÜNaalaaih duKaivanaoÊ ]pdoXa krNao ha hotu mauLIca naaih
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Champak
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| | Friday, June 10, 2005 - 4:26 pm: |
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Aa^sT/Iyaat Aalyaapasauna ekca account Aaho AaiNa %yaacao kaD- pNa maI ca vaaprto.........
sa baat po gaÝr ikyaa jaayao hujaur²
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Let me explain people out here.
I heard lot of these happening with Indian couples staying America.(Again I dont know people staying India also do or not)
lets not stray from original topic and come to the argument "vyakti titkya prakruti etc"
This is all about Indian values and Indian culture. I was surprised seeing some kind of westernisation happening now a days in Indian coupls too, manun ha topic mi chedla.
1)Mala yachi garaj vatali manun nahi.
2) Most of friends or couples doing this opinioned ki hi "kalachi garaj aahe"
3) Mag mala vatale ki kiti lok yachyat vishavas tevtat specially so called westernize zalele lok?
4) And all these people said may be I should give thought.
5) But I have different opinion that I already expressed ki..sansar ha aapla asto....etc
6) I agree 100% with champak about "The concept of marriage in India and western culture is different. "
And reason to discuss here, there are new geneartion Vs old genearation they would have something to share with their experiences in this area.
Lastly , Punya......AApan ethe Indian values related gosti kartoy.
tase baghitale tar ha jyacha tyachya belief aani sansukrutik chadan valanacha prashana aahe.
Do what you believe in.
But again, aajkaal ashya gosti hotat aahet.
hach mudda mandayacha hota aani he kitpat barobar aahe.
chuk bhool dyavi ghyavi(Sorry if anything offensive to anybody out there)
Manu
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Punya,
I was not talking about american and their beliefs. I was purely discussing that we as Indians look for totally different values and our relaitonship is based on something.
I dont want to argue if american do and indian dont do.
Point is the general tendency over here in America or western countries , I have my life, you have your life.
most of the people do believe in.
I ahve been here for quite considerable time in USA and came here also quite young age (FYI).
In spite of so called love-marriages and spending considerable time with each other , tolerance level is bad and I, me, myself individuality is strong in most of the individual.
When i said Indian coupls over here in USA doing ....its nothing to discuss about "right or wrong" but mudda ha ki "changing values"
Right & Wrong is not "really" mudda.
Thanks
Manuswini
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champak,
Tumcha punha gairsamaj zala......mala paishachi chinta nahi ho.
ek prashan, I tried writing & converting in marathi..paan kahi jamale nahi buva...
tumche kase pune marathit lihile jatey?(stupid questions though)....I tried conversion using devnagari..didnt work
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Kro tr jaÜ pya-Mt navarabaayakÜt understanding Aaho tÜvar vaogavaogaLo vaa ek~ Aka]MT hvao ha mau_a gaÝNa Aaho. AjaunahI maaJao AaiNa maaJyaa navaáyaacao
Káyaa Aqaa-nao joint account naahIÊ ek Aaho to nausato naavaalaa Aaho. dÜGaaMcao salary accounts vaogavaogaLo AahoÊ BaartahI AaiNa Amaoirkot hI. Amaoirkot pNa kQaI maI Garacao BaaDo Barto kQaI tÜ. Kro
tr tÜca BartÜÊ pNa kQaItrI maI pNa caok doto  . GarKca- pNa tsaaca.
Kro tr dÜGaaMcyaa saMsaarat tuJaM maaJaM kuzM AsatM. ekanao jarI Kca- kolaa trI dusaáyaacao vaacatat naa
AaNaI XaovaTI to dÜGaaMcaoca tr Asatat
gaÜKlyaaMcaI caarÜLI AazvalaI...
Gar dÜGaaMcao AsatM
to dÜGaaMe saavarayacaM
ekanao psarvalaM
tr dusaáyaanao AavarayacaM
no arguments, nothing... just wrote whatever I felt...
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Mrunmayi
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| | Saturday, June 11, 2005 - 7:01 am: |
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yes I agree with Wadekar... still in AM you are not well knowing your life partner.... joparyant tumhi nit ekmekana olakhat nahi toparyant tari separate account asayala have. Mi ek don cases baghitalya ahet ki lagnanantar varshachya atach divorse zala ... So it is always safe..
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Mrunmayi,
Almost every post of yours has this one line...."I agree with...". But you still have written something which contradict.
I do understand the problem of being confused.
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Champak
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| | Saturday, June 11, 2005 - 1:29 pm: |
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manauisvanaIÊ tumhI maayabaÜlaI cyaa dovanaagarI ksao ilahavao (a sadralaa BaoT Va mhNajao marazIt ilaihta
yaola.
Ana gaOrsamaja mhNaala trÊ pOXyaacaI icaMta AvaXya kravaI pNa tkI hI nakÜ ik %yaamauLo Aapna ijavanaacaa
inaBao-L AanaMd Gao] Xaknaar naahI² jyaacyaasaÜbat AayauYyaBar rhayacao Aaho %yaacyaavar ivaXvaasa zovaaÊ
maga pha kaya bahar yaoto ²
jao porala to ]gavato..... ivaXvaasa zovaa²
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Mrunmayi
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| | Monday, June 13, 2005 - 10:16 am: |
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Prashant : I am not confused. mala fakta evadhech mhanayche aahe ki joparyant tumhi ekmekana nit olakhat nahit, ekmekant vishwas nirman hot nahi toparyant separat account asave.. Nantar tumhi joint account cha vichar karu shakata. AM madhye ha vishwas vhyayala vel lagato karan tumhi purvipasun olakhat asata asa nahi. Tenva tumachya jodidarabaddal tumhi nishchitpane lagech kase kay kahi nirnay gheu shakal joparyant tumhi tyala nit olakhatach nahi.
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Milya
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| | Monday, June 13, 2005 - 12:17 pm: |
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account dÜGaaMcao AsatM
to dÜGaaMina vaaprayacaM
ekanaM jamavaayacaM
tr dusayaa-naM Kcaa-yacaM
:-)
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Hemantp
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| | Tuesday, June 14, 2005 - 2:42 am: |
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imalyaaÊ GarI fÜna kÉna kLvau ka Æ
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milya,
That was goodone:-)
idea vaparleli disate ?
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Milya
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| | Tuesday, June 14, 2005 - 6:25 am: |
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manuswini
naahi ga idea vaparali naahi pan vaparayala harkat naahi. (hyatalaa dusara hota yenaar asel tar ) :-)
hemant : nako re baabaa asale kaahi karus. nahitar majhi kaahi khair naahi :-)
Jokes apart
joint account asayala kaahi harkat naahi pan te muddamhun kadhalele nasave doghani thodethode paise takavet ase.
tyapeksha doghanchi salary account joint karun kadhi he vaparaave kadhi te. tyaat hisheb nasava kuthale kit vaparale. ase mala vaatate ani ase amhi karato
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Then why not have pre-nuptial agreement instead. You can decide what you want to share and what not. That will solve most of the money issues.
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campak,
kuthe aahe he sadar`"devnagari kase lihave" mi jevha post khalil "devanagari" var click karte tehva te kahitari bhayanak marathi convert hote
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Champak
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| | Wednesday, June 15, 2005 - 10:34 am: |
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/hitguj/messages/1/41.html?1118219574
manauisvanaI hI ilaMk baGaa²
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I THINK THERE SHOULD BE JOINT ACCOUNT . THE REASONS I AM THINKING ARE AS FOLLOWS
CONDITION NO.1) IF THE MARRIAGE IS LOVE MARRIAGE THAT MEANS BOTH THE PARTNERS HAVE ENOUGH BELIEF ON EACH OTHER (ASSUMED THAT THEY REALLY KNOW EACH OTHER FROM MENTAL,PHYSICAL & ECONOMICAL POINT ) .NOW THE JOINT ACCOUNT WILL WORK HERE AS ONLY BOOST TO INCREASE THE BELIEF WHICH THEY ALREADY HAVE WHICH WILL ALTIMATELY RESULT INTO INCREASE IN LOVE.
CONDTION 2) IF THE MARRIAGE IS ARRANGED MARRIAGE ,& ONLY ONE PARTNER IS EARNING THEN THE JOINT ACCOUNT WILL HELP TO TAKE THE AMOUNT REQUIRED IN THE ABSENCE OF OTHER & INFORMING THE OTHER PARTNER @THAT WHICH IN TURN WILL INCREASE THE ACCOUNTABILITY & FAITH WHICH WILL BRING THEM CLOSER.
CONDITION 3)IF THE MARRIAGE IS ARRANGED & BOTH OF THEM ARE EARNING THEN THE JOINT ACCOUNT WILL HELP THEM TO GO FOR BIGGER AMOUNT OF LOAN.
I THINK I HAVE COVERED MUCH OF THE ASPECTS OF EARNING & SPENdING ,OFCOURSE I HAVE ASSUMED THAT BOTH ARE "SAMANJAS"
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Samrya
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| | Wednesday, June 15, 2005 - 6:19 pm: |
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naahitar paishe majhya account madhe jama kara ani mug tumhala laagtil tase me dein .. vaadch nako
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Storvi
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| | Wednesday, June 15, 2005 - 11:12 pm: |
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ok seriously what's the problem here? is a joint account a good thing or a bad thing??
I was believing it was a good thing. Doesn't it show trust and understanding between the couple? Gar AaplaM Aaho ho jar daKvaayaca Asaola tr joint account yaÜgya naahI kaÆ Aamaca joint account Aaho. [tr kuzlahI account naahIÊ AaiNa Asaa p`XNaM hI kQaI Aalaa naahI. baakI PN laa maaJao AnaumaÜdna
AaiNa baaya dI vao ho Ô> [qao GaDt AsaM naahI. even before I got here, my brothers and cousins had joint accounts with there spouses. joint accounts hI kaLacaI garja Aahoca not because of distrust but because of a new found(at least in India) belief that women are equal partners in a home, and an account cannot belong to the husband alone.
btw. thanks Eliza
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Bee
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| | Thursday, June 16, 2005 - 12:22 am: |
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But what if u do not get along in future with ur hubby/wife? then one day cheating might occure that husband/wife has transferred all the money to his/her another account mag tumhee fasale kee nahi. u will get that money but why to have this kind of experience at the first place. I think u should have joint account say after five years.
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| मायबोली |
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| चोखंदळ ग्राहक |
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| महाराष्ट्र धर्म वाढवावा |
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| व्यक्तिपासून वल्लीपर्यंत |
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| पांढर्यावरचे काळे |
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| गावातल्या गावात |
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| तंत्रलेल्या मंत्रबनात |
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| आरोह अवरोह |
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| शुभंकरोती कल्याणम् |
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| विखुरलेले मोती |
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